IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You are leaving a job and coming back to your hometown. Write a letter to your friend and say : 1. What is the reason for your leaving 2. What do you plan to do 3. Where an when will you meet your friend to discuss it

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Dear Ali, I’m writing to let you know that I’m leaving my job and coming back to my hometown. The main reason for
this
Linking Words
 decision is my mother. Unfortunately, she suffers from a serious cancer
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I have to look after him until she can manage her responsibilities on her own.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I’d like to
lunch
Verb problem
open
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 my own pharmacy in my hometown to support local people, as I think that it’s a great opportunity to help
society
Correct article usage
the society
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 I am belonging. So, I am leaving my job and coming to our hometown. As I said, I am thinking about
lunching
Use the right word
launching
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 a pharmacy in the city, but I need some help, particularly in finding a suitable place that gives easy access to patients from all around the city.
In addition
Linking Words
, I’d like to know
Linking Words
that is
Correct word choice
if
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 there
any
Verb problem
is any
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 medical centre? Because it can have a positive impact on my business growth. I was wondering if it
can
Wrong verb form
would
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 be possible for you to meet each other
in
Change preposition
on
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 September 26. We can go to the café that was our regular place during our university years. Thank you for your consideration and time. I look forward to hearing from you. Take care, Mohammadreza

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task response
Give a clear day for the meeting, such as 26 September. Also say why you need your friend’s help in a more direct way.
task response
Check key words: write “launch” not “lunch”, and say “my mother” with “her”, not “him”.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end. Make the plan part shorter and keep each paragraph on one main point.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links such as “First”, “Also”, and “For this reason” to show how your ideas are joined.
coherence and cohesion
Write the meeting line more clearly: “Could we meet on 26 September at our usual café?”
task response
You answer all three main parts: why you are leaving, what you plan to do, and where you want to meet.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting, friendly tone, and closing fit a letter to a friend.
coherence and cohesion
The place for the meeting is clear: the café you went to during your university years.
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