IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. Whats is your opinion about this?

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The issue of
wether if
Correct your spelling
whether
 the countryside should be open to
bulid
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build
 new homes or it is more
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 to protect it's valuety has attracted considerable attention in recent years. With all perspectives on
this
Linking Words
 matter
vary
Wrong verb form
varying
show examples
,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 clearly stand with
that
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the idea that
show examples
 we need to keep
protect
Wrong verb form
protecting
show examples
 the countryside
due to
Linking Words
 it subtintial value.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, one
comppling
Correct your spelling
compelling
 argument is that it is more essential to protect the environment.
This
Linking Words
 is largely
becaus
Correct your spelling
because
 it may
caused
Wrong verb form
cause
show examples
 a significant extinction in some
spesies
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species
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that they can not
communicat
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communicate
 with humans. For
instant
Use the right word
instance
show examples
,

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task response
Your view is clear: you think the countryside should be kept safe. However, the answer stops very early. Add a full body paragraph about another reason, such as food, clean air, wildlife, or green space. Then add a short ending that repeats your main view.
task response
Explain each main point more fully. After saying homes may harm animals, say how building work can take away their homes, trees, and food. Use one clear real or made-up example to show this.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple plan: introduction, first reason, second reason, and ending. Start each paragraph with one clear main idea. This will make your answer easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words such as "First", "Also", "For example", "Because of this", and "In the end". Make sure every sentence is complete. Do not end a paragraph after "For instance"; give the example.
coherence and cohesion
Make your first sentence shorter and clearer. For example: "People need new homes, but building in the countryside can cause harm. I believe we should protect it." This gives a clear start.
task response
You give a clear opinion from the start: the countryside should be protected.
coherence and cohesion
Your first body paragraph has one main idea about harm to the environment, which is a good start.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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