The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992.

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The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992.
The data compares the popularity of various
vocation
Replace the word
vocational
types between
males
Use synonyms
and
females
Use synonyms
in the UK
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
in 1992. One striking feature is that clerical or related fields were the highest indicators in
females
Use synonyms
’ side, and the same opinion was true for managerial and professional callings in
males
Use synonyms
’ side. General labourers did not show only the lowest metric for women
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
also
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
definition is true for
men’s
Add an article
the men’s
show examples
group
Use synonyms
.
Female
Add an article
The female
show examples
category was
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
superior in clerical or related, other non-manual, and other manual; the remaining ones belong to
males
Use synonyms
Rephrase
apply
show examples
hence
Linking Words
. On the one hand, there was a significant difference in clerical and related occupations for
two
Add an article
the two
show examples
charts, the figures are 31% for
females
Use synonyms
and 6% for
males
Use synonyms
. Other non-manual vocations had a higher figure in
females
Use synonyms
than
males
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,
it is accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
for 9% and 6% respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there was a negligible difference in other manual jobs between the two sides
,
Add a semicolon
;
show examples
this
Linking Words
indicator amounted to 27% and 26% for women and
men
Punctuation problem
men,
show examples
respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, managerial and professional occupations had the
higher
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
figure in
male
Add an article
the male
show examples
group
Use synonyms
,
Add a semicolon
;
show examples
statistics show that
this
Linking Words
type of
vocations
Check wording
occupation
show examples
accounted for 29% in
female
Add an article
the female
show examples
group
Use synonyms
, and 36% in
male
Add an article
the male
show examples
group
Use synonyms
. General labourers
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
amounted to 2% in
females
Use synonyms
and 1% in
males
Use synonyms
, these were the lowest figures for each category. Men were occupying
majority
Add an article
the majority
show examples
of craft or similar jobs
,
Add a semicolon
;
show examples
Linking Words
consequently
Add a comma
consequently,
show examples
the metric of
males
Use synonyms
accounted for 24%
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
the same indicator shows 3% in
females
Use synonyms

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words males, females, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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