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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average number of hours adults in the UK spent on different daily activities in selected years from 1985 to 2023. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The graph below shows the average number of hours adults in the UK spent on different daily activities in selected years from 1985 to 2023. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph provides key information about the average daily
hours
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
spent on activities by adults in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
British society in the period between 1985 and 2023. The units are measured by average
hours
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the figure that the working and studying activity had the maximum
hours
Use synonyms
 compared to other activities.
In addition
Linking Words
, sleeping activity had steadily decreased,
whereas
Linking Words
 leisure and hobbies were increasing slightly.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, in 1985, household chores had 3
hours
Use synonyms
 per day.
Linking Words
While in
Correct word choice
In
show examples
 2000 was dropped to nearly 2.8
hours
Use synonyms
 daily.
Moreover
Linking Words
, from 2015 to 2023, it had
been
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 minimum
around
Change preposition
of around
show examples
 2.2
hours
Use synonyms
 daily. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
socialising and communicating, from 1985 to 2000 was declined from 1.1 to 0.7
hours
Use synonyms
 per day.
whereas
Linking Words
 in the period between 2000 and 2023 it had been
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
increasing dramatically,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
rising from approximately 1 to 1.8
hours
Use synonyms
 per day.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
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