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Band 5.5

The diagram below shows the life cycle of the honey bee. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The diagram below shows the life cycle of the honey bee. Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram illustrates the life cycle of the honey
bee
Use synonyms
,showing the different stages involved in the
process
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.
Additionally
Linking Words
,it highlights the step-by-step transformation involved from the initial phase to the final outcome.
Overall
Linking Words
,the
process
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 consists of six main stages, beginning with laying 1 or 2
eggs
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 from the females and ending with maturing the
bee
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.It is a cyclical natural
process
Use synonyms
 that
toahes
Correct your spelling
takes
 approximately 34 to 36
days
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 in total to
comlet
Correct your spelling
complete
,in which the
bee
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 goes through several stages before the
bee
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 becomes fully matured.
At the first stage
Linking Words
 of the
process
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,the females lay 1 or 2
eggs
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 every three
days
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.
Following
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this
Linking Words
,the
eggs
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 are hatched after 9-10
days
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.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the fifth day,the
eggs
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 are opened.After that,
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the seventh
day
Add a comma
day,
show examples
 the bees become bigger.The bees in the ninth
dayas
Correct your spelling
day as
 a nymph,it moults 3 times as it grows. In the following stage,a young
adults
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adult
show examples
 emerges from the nymph phase.
Finally
Linking Words
,the bees are matured in 4
days
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,allowing the cycle to repeat itself and
thus
Linking Words
 completing the entire
process
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.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words bee, process, eggs, days with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • life cycle
  • laying of eggs
  • queen bee
  • hatch into larvae
  • rapid growth
  • develop into pupae
  • significant transformation
  • emergence of the adult bee
  • matures fully
  • cyclical nature
  • colony’s survival
  • reproduction process
  • subsequent generations
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