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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those relate to science and technology. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction
More and more people think that students at the undergraduate level should
study
Use synonyms
 any course they like,
while
Linking Words
 others claim that scientific subjects are more crucial
due to
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 their importance on future. From my perspective, both opinions are equally important for two reasons.
Body paragraph 1
First of all, some individuals would argue that studying
courses
Use synonyms
 like arts and music will affect education in a positive way. The argument is that after understanding in-depth information, a student should learn a course that relates to their hobbies.
This
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 proposal is likely to encourage them to
study
Use synonyms
 more, ultimately leading to an improvement in the educational system. A
study
Use synonyms
 conducted by the Department of Education at Melbourne University in 2025 concluded that 65% of teachers in Sydney believe that music and sports
courses
Use synonyms
 are vital in the educational process.
Therefore
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, the performance of education will be enhanced
due to
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 the presence of
this
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 strategy.
Body paragraph 2
Conversely
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, I am convinced that all students have to
study
Use synonyms
courses
Use synonyms
 that are associated with science and technology. What I mean is that physics and mathematics are essential
courses
Use synonyms
 in order for them to be employed in most products and services.
This
Linking Words
 process is able to develop new and advanced technologies, which in turn improve the industrial sectors in the country.
For instance
Linking Words
, a high-school student learns how to invet an new processor by using industrial materials
such
Linking Words
 as semiconductors.
As a result
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, the technological aspect is likely to be improved if that method is taken into account.
Conclusion
In conclusion, a significant number of people believe that all university learners should
study
Use synonyms
 whatever they like,
while
Linking Words
 a group of people argue that practical subject is vital for reasons related to technology.

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task response
You discuss both sides, but your own view is not fully clear. The first body says students should follow what they like, but the second body says all students have to study science and technology. State one clear view and keep it the same in the whole essay.
task response
Explain the ideas more fully. Say why arts and music help students, and why science and technology are needed for the future. Then show why one side, or a balance of both sides, is better.
task response
Use examples that are real and easy to believe. The study about teachers in Sydney is not explained enough. Also, a high-school student making a new processor is not a strong example for university study. Use a simple example of jobs, health care, or new tools instead.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear basic shape: an opening, two main parts, and an ending. Make the opening view clearer so the reader knows your answer from the start.
coherence and cohesion
Each main part needs a clearer link from point to reason to example. For example: students enjoy a subject, so they work harder, which can lead to better learning.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Words such as “First of all”, “Conversely”, “For instance”, and “In conclusion” help, but some links do not fit the idea well. “Conversely” is fine for the other side, but the final line should clearly repeat your own view.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid unclear phrases such as “the performance of education” and “this strategy”. Name the exact idea again, such as “allowing students to choose arts subjects”, so the meaning is easy to follow.
task response
You answer both parts of the question by giving one paragraph for free choice and one for science and technology.
task response
You try to give reasons and examples, rather than only state opinions.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are easy to see, and each one has a main topic.
coherence and cohesion
You use a clear ending to bring the essay to a close.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • study
  • subject
  • choice
  • free
  • like
  • future
  • useful
  • science
  • tech
  • job
  • work
  • pay
  • grow
  • life
  • skill
  • think
  • read
  • write
  • talk
  • plan
  • core
  • mix
  • balance
  • advice
  • opportunity
  • interest
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