IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You were recently disrespected by one of the employees at your local supermarket. Write a letter to the supermarket manager. In your letter • tell why you were speaking with the employee • describe the employee's rude behavior • explain what you'd like the manager to do

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to apprise you of my recent dissatisfaction with the customer service at your
convinient
Correct your spelling
convenient
 store. I came yesterday
at
Change preposition
to
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 your store to get
a
Correct article usage
some
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 green chillis for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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dinner
,
Punctuation problem
. While
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while
Linking Words
 I was struggling to find
that
Correct pronoun usage
them
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, I asked one of your employees to give me an assistence in finding
out
Verb problem
apply
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chillis for me.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I was in
rush
Add an article
a rush
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 as I was already getting late for my work,
So
Fix capitalization
so
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 I asked that girl to help me out
to foster
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with
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 my grocery shopping. Let me tell you her reaction when I asked her for the guidance .
Instead
Linking Words
 of
givining
Correct your spelling
giving
 me the directions, she looked at me in
arrogrance
Correct your spelling
arrogance
 and
therefore
Linking Words
 told me that she does not know where it is, which obviously means that she was probably not satisfied with her workplace or was not feeling well at the moment. I would kindly like you to take
this
Linking Words
 matter as a serious concern
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is ultimately crucial for the working dynamics
as well as
Linking Words
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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customer satisfaction.
In addition
Linking Words
, regular meetings on the needs and the policies of the company should be held in order to avoid
such
Linking Words
 behaviour of employees on
daily
Add an article
a daily
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 basis. I look forward
for
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to
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 your prompt response. Yours faithfully, John sith

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task response
Say more clearly why you spoke to the worker: you could not find green chillies and needed help because you were late. Explain exactly what you want the manager to do, such as speak to the worker, give staff training, and reply to you.
task response
Do not guess why the worker was rude. Focus on what you saw and heard. For example, say that she looked away, spoke in an unfriendly way, and did not try to help.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end. Make the ideas flow better by using short, clear sentences and linking words such as 'because', 'however', and 'therefore'.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph focused on one main point: the reason for your visit, the rude behavior, and the action you want. This will make the letter easier to read.
language accuracy
Check spelling and word forms carefully. For example: 'convenient', 'green chillies', 'assistance', 'arrogance', 'giving', and 'in a rush'. Use 'at your store', not 'at your convenient store'.
task response
You cover all the main parts of the letter: why you spoke to the worker, what happened, and what you want the manager to do.
coherence and cohesion
The letter uses a polite opening and closing, and the paragraphs follow a sensible order.
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