IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The chart below gives information about the most common sports played in New Zealand in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about the most common sports played in New Zealand in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #sports #zealand #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar chart illustrates information about the most common sports played in New Zealand in 2002.
Also
, it shows the
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
who participated
show examples
participated
Wrong verb form
participating
show examples
 in each type of
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport
show examples
. First of all,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 clear that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
soccer
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is the favourite game
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
boyes
Correct your spelling
boys
Boyes
.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
netball is mostly
playd
Correct your spelling
played
 by
girls
.
However
, both gender
enjoy
Change the verb form
enjoys
show examples
play
Wrong verb form
playing
show examples
 Basketball so the
number
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 fairly equal.
According to
 the graph, cricket is a famous game among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
males over 10
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Though, there is
hardly
Replace the word
hard
show examples
 to find any
girls
 are
intrested
Correct your spelling
interested
 in
this
sport
 there is only 1% of them.In
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, it
is seems
Change the verb form
seems
show examples
 that
boyes
Correct your spelling
boys
Boyes
 prefer Marital arts with around 10 %.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it is
remarkbale
Correct your spelling
remarkable
 that
girls
 go
swiming
Correct your spelling
swimming
 more than
boys
 over 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
girls
 swim when there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 less than 15 of
boys
.
also
Add a comma
,also
show examples
 the
number
 of
female
Change to a plural noun
females
show examples
 who plays netball
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 almost over
25percent
Correct your spelling
25 percent
,
boys
Correct word choice
and boys
show examples
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
 to not have in
intresting
Correct your spelling
interesting
investing
 in
this
sport
. In conclusion , the
number
 of
boys
 who
plays
Wrong verb form
played
show examples
Add an article
the sport
a sport
show examples
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
 in New Zealand in 2002
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 more than the
number
 of
girls
 except in two sports.
It is clear that
girls
 prefer
other type
Change the wording
another type
other types
show examples
 of
sport
rither
Correct your spelling
rather
 than the common ones.
Submitted by asd43214321asd on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent, girls, number, sport, boys with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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