Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

It is common that numbers of children join diverse organization to
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
their
life
Suggestion
lives
. Taking part in different activities is beneficial to children, but a lot of them are not
decide
Suggestion
decided
by themselves. They often obey to their parents. So, there is belief that children should depend on themselves. They should adjust their
life
Suggestion
lives
by themselves
Accept space
.
.
learning arrange their own life is important too.
This
essay
agree
Suggestion
agrees
that children should understand the schedule their time is important and should know how to
deal it better
Suggestion
deal with it better
.
However
, they should be guided by parents at the beginning stage. The youth are the ones who more deeply understand themselves. Compared with others, only the youth themselves truly know their pastimes.
Although
parents can talk to them, they have their own preferences. It might exist some misunderstanding,
then
parents might choose a subject the children have no interest on it. So, it is better children choose their own hobbies and take part in the institutions,
then
arrange it by themselves
Suggestion
.
However
, children are too young to know how to seek the right hobbies.
children
Suggestion
Children
are not mature enough to choose the right hobbies.
If
refers to the speaker or writer
I
just let children decide by themselves, they might pick just browse
internet
Suggestion
the internet
and join a group that only play video games. It is obviously not that ideal.
For example
, when my brothers were young they always choose to play video games together. It is hard for them to choose a truly good
interests
Suggestion
interest
without parents‘ help.
to
Suggestion
To
summarise, children should acquire how to schedule their spare time, but they should guide by parents
first
.
Therefore
, they can choose good organizations to spend time and can choose what
they
of them or themselves
their
interest.
Submitted by jkl12zys on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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