Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?
Nowadays,
violence
on television
and in computer
games
has led
a great impact on Verb problem
had
the
society.Some people believe that it can affect one's life Correct article usage
apply
whereas
, few deny the fact that it can be influential in people's behaviour
in any aspects
. Fix the agreement mistake
aspect
However
, in my opnion
, I feel that Correct your spelling
opinion
television
and computer
games
does
not have a damaging effect on Change the verb form
do
the
society in most of the perspective. Correct article usage
apply
Firstly
, when we look into the factors that can have a damaging effect on the
society, Correct article usage
apply
for instance
, unpleasant language used in the
Correct article usage
apply
television
content or use
of slang words in gaming, these can lead to substantial behavioural changes in a Correct article usage
the use
person
's life. In spite of the fact that the behaviour
of an individual is not controlled by external aspects, I believe that there are few circumstances where it can be seen that a person
perform
certain actions based on what he has perceived earlier. Correct subject-verb agreement
performs
Computer
games
, which is
mostly used by Correct subject-verb agreement
are
young
generation, can affect their mentality in Add an article
the young
altogether
many different aspects. It can harm their mind and deteriorate their thinking ability. It can Rephrase
apply
cause
Verb problem
have
huge
impact Add an article
a huge
in
one's Change preposition
on
well being
. A Add a hyphen
well-being
person
learns from what he has perceived from others. Similary
, Correct your spelling
Similarly
violence
shown on television
and in computer
games
directly impacts an individual's mind and he acts exactly the same way whenever such
similar
situation arises. Correct article usage
a similar
Television
is a platform where people learn most of the things and
which in turn can be referred Correct word choice
apply
as
a measure of influence in a Change preposition
to as
person
's behaviour
. It can change a person
drastically. Television
can be considered as a major aspect that shapes a person
in terms of behaviour
, actions and thinking power. In addition
, violence
on television
and games
has a great influence on an individual's skills as well. All things considered, violence
on television
and in gaming
world is one of the major Add an article
the gaming
aspect
Change to a plural noun
aspects
in
an individual's behavioural change which can harm the individual and change him as a human.Change preposition
of
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite