IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think that people should choose their job based on income in order to provide security to their families. Do you think money is an important factor when choosing a job? What other factors should be considered

#people #job #income #security #families #money #factor #factors
Some people think choose a job which gives better income. I personally do not agree with the views. Earning money is important but if helps in our basic need that would be enough. From my point of view, if you are able to fulfil the basic need like house rent, bill payments and own needs that far enough. Some people don't consider salary as a priority. They focus on learning new things to enhance their knowledge and other side some people earn for helping in society and involved in social work. To put it simply, choosing a job for earnings has never given satisfaction, always choose work which gives you self-satisfaction. Learn new things, implement on the job and at the same time spend time with your family. Give your kids a good lifestyle and they should learn to adjust. When you are happy with the things what you are doing, you will be happy with the income. To conclude, I agree good income is required and very essential to balance our lifestyle, but if you are earning good so better work for your interest, spend time with your family.
Submitted by ankita.t18 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • job fulfillment
  • work-life integration
  • career progression
  • organizational culture
  • ethical alignment
  • sustainable employment
  • geographical proximity
  • social contribution
  • occupational health
  • creative autonomy
  • income potential
  • benefits package
  • professional development
  • commuter concerns
  • work environment
  • personal satisfaction
  • financial remuneration
  • industry stability
  • innovative capacity
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!