IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and include relevant examples.

#employee #employer #attention #qualities #qualifications
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Emplyee
Suggestion
Ample
 is one of the key
element
Suggestion
elements
 behind the growth of
company
Suggestion
the company
a company
. During the hiring,
interviewer
Suggestion
the interviewer
interviewers
 should more focus on internal ability rather than academic
achivement
the action of accomplishing something
achievement
achievements
 and experience in the field. I agree with the opinion to
large extent
Suggestion
a large extent
 and my inclination justified in
ensuing paragraphs
Suggestion
the ensuing paragraphs
. Among the various viewpoints, the strongest one is, candidate with
flexible nature
Suggestion
the flexible nature
easily adopt
Suggestion
easily adopts
 the new system or technology implemented in the organisation.
For instance
Linking Words
, in the field of Information
Technoloy
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
Technology
 salaried have to work with many
kind
Suggestion
kinds
 of softwares in periodical
time
Use synonyms
. To change with the new software, it can be
unconfortable
conducive to or feeling mental discomfort
uncomfortable
 for the employee
whi
the person or persons that; the one that
who
will
 have
fix mind-set
Suggestion
the fix mind-set
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, person with
calm personality
Suggestion
a calm personality
 gives importance to search the solution in critical situation rather than waiting for superior.
Individual
Suggestion
An individual
Individually
 with
this
Linking Words
 kind of
approach adjust
Accept comma addition
approach, adjust
 in the environment very fast and improve the team-work.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the
time
Use synonyms
 of
short deadline
Suggestion
short deadlines
,
behaviour
Suggestion
the behaviour
 of the team member plays
key role
Suggestion
a key role
.
Employee
Suggestion
An employee
The employee
 who
have
Suggestion
has
 nature to agree on every situation without any objection ready to do overtime to meet the deadline of any task. In
this
Linking Words
 situation management can do proper resource allocation to
achive
to gain with effort
achieve
 the task. Apart from
this
Linking Words
,
ability
Suggestion
the ability
 of multitasking creates
positive impression
Suggestion
a positive impression
 of employee in the company and increase the change of
higher position
Suggestion
higher positions
 in
short amount
Suggestion
a short amount
 of
time
Use synonyms
. On
contrary
Suggestion
the contrary
, it is difficult to judge the candidate in
such
Linking Words
 a short
time
Use synonyms
 of interview. Qualification ranks
clearls
readily apparent to the mind
clears
 the picture of
ability
Suggestion
the ability
 of the person which was judged by
institutes
Suggestion
the institutes
. So, it is good to take
dissission
the act of making up your mind about something
decisions
 based on the degree and
result
Suggestion
the result
results
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, for
specific vacancy
Suggestion
a specific vacancy
specific vacancies
,
person
Suggestion
a person
people
 have to relay on the university results.
For example
Linking Words
, to hire a candidate for a temporary research topic, it is important the good knowledge on that specific area rather than nature. All in all, for growth of the company and achieve the specific goal on
time
Use synonyms
 behaviour is
most important
Suggestion
more important
of
Suggestion
for
 the
emplyee
a worker who is hired to perform a job
employee
employees
. Where as in recruitment for limited area or
time
Use synonyms
 importance to the degree and experience
hold
Suggestion
holds
 more
benefite
financial assistance in time of need
benefit
benefits
 to the
orfanisation
the persons (or committees or departments etc.) who make up a body for the purpose of administering something
organisation
organization
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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