Employers should give longer holidays to employees to encourage them to do their job well. Do you agree or disagree?

Providing employees with long
vocations
leisure time away from work devoted to rest or pleasure
vacations
motivate them to
work
more better
Suggestion
better
. I completely agree with
this
viewpoint and
this
essay, I will support my view with examples.
To begin
with, employees
work
more efficient
Suggestion
more efficiently
after a certain time of
break
Suggestion
the break
. Researches show that people who
work
with rest show more better job than people who
work
without
break
Suggestion
a break
breaks
. It is all because of the human mind structure.Non-resting hard working brain leads to the decrease of the
work
efficiency.
Consequently
, the
bussiness
a commercial or industrial enterprise and the people who constitute it
business
of a company may
fell
Suggestion
fall
down. Another point would be increase of an interest
to
Suggestion
in
the job after the break that the company gave.
Majority
Suggestion
The majority
of workers think that a good company should give its employees a long holiday depending on their doing
job
Suggestion
the job
well. So, after having a long break employees gets to
work
hard because of getting a good
vocation
leisure time away from work devoted to rest or pleasure
vacation
time. To conclude, giving workers longer holidays support them to
work
better. I totally agree with
this
statement according
Accept comma addition
statement, according
to the point that I gave in the essay.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: