IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

while recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience.to what extent do you agree or disagree?give your opinion and include relevant examples.

#employee #employer #attention #qualities #qualifications
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As we are
living in competitive
Suggestion
living in a competitive
 era
,
Accept space
,
recent decades have witnessed mushrooming growth of numerous industries;
Therefore
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, recruiting
right candidate
Suggestion
the right candidate
 for a particular job has become crucial. Conventional employers give preference to the experience and qualification of an individual. While other advocate that personal skills and qualities play
vital role
Suggestion
a vital role
 in an organisation. To initiate with, every
year thousands
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year, thousands
 of
student
Suggestion
students
 passed out from schools
,
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,
colleges and universities
,
Accept space
,
which raise the standard of recruiting people for the right job. In some fields
such
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 as film industry, front desk job, employers want good communication skills, attractive personality
,
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,
knowledge of computing skills which not only increase the profit but
also
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 face the growth of an organisation.
For instance
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, in
entertainment industry
Suggestion
the entertainment industry
, comedians become famous because of entertaining people and welfare of society in terms of removing stress
,
Accept space
,
anxiety and depression problems and spread happiness. On the flip side, a handful of people think that experience and qualification must be considered while recruiting the person. Some professions like Teaching, Chartered accountant, Doctor, Lawyer
etcetera
Suggestion
 required 80% knowledge and 20% communication and other skills.
For instance
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, in classrooms, a good teacher must have knowledge of
subject matter
Suggestion
the subject matter
a subject matter
 along with understanding the IQ level of children
,
Accept space
,
otherwise
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,
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,
students do not learn anything and create nuisance in
classroom
Suggestion
the classroom
a classroom
. All in all, every coin has two sides. Giving importance to one area of will reduce productivity. In my opinion, minimum standard should be set by the employer while recruiting the person and after that
weightage
Suggestion
 should be given according to the needs of the profession.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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