IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It is a positive thing for people who are in senior management positions in companies to have much higher salaries than other employees in the same company or organization. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #management #positions #companies #salaries #employees #company #organization
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Management
 is a steering wheel to an
organization
 and senior
management
 professionals strategically lead the company to reach its vision and goal. Even though some people state that the senior managers are not worthy to receive
higher salary
Suggestion
a higher salary
higher salaries
 than others in the same
organization but
Accept comma addition
organization, but
 I strongly disagree
to
Suggestion
with
 the statement and the following paragraphs will support it.
To begin
 with there is a stereotype prevailing in most of the companies that the senior
management
 people spend less time and earn more money though it’s not true. The fact is that the salary paid to them is not based on the hours they work in the
office but
Accept comma addition
office, but
 the years of experience and hard work they have put
on
Suggestion
in
 to reach
this
 height. Rather than the new technical staffs who try to resolve a problem for that moment, the senior personals take decision so that the same problem is not encountered in
future
Suggestion
the future
. To add on, senior
management
 people are continuously updated and upgraded about the recent trends in their industry and
this
 made them to be both technically and tactically proficient.
Moreover
,
most important part
Suggestion
the most important part
 of being in a higher hierarchy is to manage different types of people in different levels and
this
 leadership skill cannot be achieved in
few years
Suggestion
a few years
the few years
. An
organization
 can be
operational
Suggestion
operated
 even without a senior official to manage
it but
Accept comma addition
it, but
 it cannot grow bigger and better without them. To conclude, paying higher salaries to senior
management
 professionals is a way of showing them respect for being a pillar in supporting the
organization
 from downfall and the fellow subordinates needs to accept it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: