Employers should give their workers at least one month holiday a year as it makes them to do better at their job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#employers #workers #month #holiday #year #job

People's opinions differ whether or not managers should give staff at least 28 days off per year to improve their job performance.As far as I'm concerned, I strongly agree with the above statement.My arguments to

this

point are listed as follows. The main reason for my propensity is that holidays make employees

work

more effectively. As we know,

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owadays,

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hey have to spend at least 8 hours a day working. It makes them feel more stressful

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ored and pressure.

Consequently

, their

work

qualities will fall down day by day, their healths will be probably affected and their companies' profits will suffer a lot. So, I believe that a long holiday is one of the best ways to deal with

this

problem. It enables them to reduce a lot stress they faced up with during their

work

and boost them for working

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Take Google as an example,

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his company provides its staff a month compulsory for the holiday.

Therefore

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they can stay away from

work

and rejuvenate. Another reason can be seen by everyone is that when they

work

for a long period

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they will hardly ever have much time for families,

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riends and especially for themselves. When you spend very little time for them, it is rather easy to lead to the broken relationships

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As a result

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hey cannot concentrate on your

work

and maybe it makes their productivity decrease. A long vacation every year helps them n

ot only remain

Suggestion

doesn't only remain

don't only remain

relationships with each other, but

also

pursue other productive activities

such

as reading,

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hotography,... From what has been discussed above

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employees who are given at least one month holiday

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ot only

work

better to increase production and proceeds but they

also

are mentally and physically strong.

This

will absolutely make economic development and stabilize society.

Submitted by huong78797879 on Wed Feb 05 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Employers should give their workers at least one month holiday a year as it makes them to do better at their job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some cities, the government has tried to reduce traffic. For instance, they imposed a congestion tax during rush hours. Do you think this development is positive or negative?

Nowadays, we are surround by advertising in our daily lives. Some people believe this has a positive effect on society. Others, however, say that it is a negative development. Discuss with both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

In some countries, secondary schools aim to provide a general education across a range of subjects. In others, children focus on a narrow range of subjects related to a particular career. Which do you think is appropriate in today’s world?

Some people think that family has the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think that other factors such as television, friend, music have the biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?