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Band 4.5

Many graduates nowadays are finding it difficult to get a job. Why do you think this is? How can this problem be solved?

#graduates #job
Many students nowadays want to have a great
education
. They spend a lot of time and money on studying.
However
, sometimes if you are a graduate and you have a poor
education
 it will have
problem
Suggestion
problems
a problem
 with your future. Today universities try to keep balance and find
solutions but
Accept comma addition
solutions, but
 it’s not easy and always
work
. The main reason why it is hard to find a
job
 is that graduates make a choice for history and philosophy degree. There are courses is not so valuable and subjects cannot help graduates at professional fields. A
further
 reason is that employers have a few workplaces for those graduates. If students cannot find a
job
, they will go at not rewarding
work
.
Therefore
, they will have
to must
Accept comma addition
to, must
 do a very boring
job
. One solution is creating extra valuable courses like computing, a foreign language and some business subjects.
Government
Suggestion
The government
 must encourage graduates, universities and fee some courses if State needs students that are more professional, because there is always finds professional doctors, engineers and lawyers. Another solution
is talk with
Suggestion
is to talk with
 employers about
create
Suggestion
creating
 new workplaces and invite more students on
work
 practice. They will be able to
analyze
consider in detail and subject to an analysis in order to discover essential features or meaning
analyse
 the future, make
right choice
Suggestion
the right choice
 and lead directly to fascinating
work
. To conclude, graduates would not
work
 at bad places due to usual
education
. Every student can find an interesting
job
 and enjoy it. So employers cannot
using
Suggestion
use
 for low salary graduates. Only together government and universities can solve
this
 problem and find more workplaces for new graduates and students with usual
education
.
Submitted by alisa.chernikova.eng on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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