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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph compares the percentage of international and the percentage of UK students gaining secound class degree or better at a major UK university. Summarise the infomation by selucting and reporting the main features.

The graph compares the percentage of international and the percentage of UK students gaining secound class degree or better at a major UK university. Summarise the infomation by selucting and reporting the main features.
#percentage #uk #students #secound #class #university #summarise #infomation #features
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This
 column chart illustrates
about
Change preposition
apply
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the figure
of
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for
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UK
 and
foreigner
Replace the word
foreign
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student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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Correct pronoun usage
who attend
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attend
Wrong verb form
attending
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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postgraduates
Fix the agreement mistake
postgraduate
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 or
master
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master's
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 degrees in various types of
Add an article
the field
a field
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field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
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 in the year 2009. At first glance, both groups of students are interested
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in differently
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differently
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different
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 types of
Add an article
the subject
a subject
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subject
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subjects
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 in the
UK
 university.
UK
student
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students
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 liked to apply
in
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to
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 the field of Art history, Sociology
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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the most. Both classes account for 80%. Nursing or English Literature represents the
second
 popularity at approximately 75%, and International Law made up the
third
 at 70%.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 Electrical Engineer was
least
Change the article
the least
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popularity
Replace the word
popular
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 merely at 65%.
Conversely
, Electrical Engineer was the
second
 favourite for International at 8o%. The most popular class for
foreigner
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foreign
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 students was Information Technology,
meanwhile
Add a comma
,meanwhile
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 the lowest percentage was
international
Change the capitalization
International
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 Law.
However
, similar numbers of
UK
 and International
scholar
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scholars
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 were equal in Nursing and Accountancy
class
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classes
show examples
, at roughly 85% and 60% respectively. In summary,
UK
 pupil likely attends
in
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apply
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theoretical
Add an article
the theoretical
a theoretical
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 subject, but International student usually applied
in
Change preposition
to
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 practical class and vice versa.
Submitted by tongmek158 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "second".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words uk with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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