IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people get into debt by buying things they don't need and can't afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

#people #debt #behaviour #action
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In
this
Linking Words
 essay I am discussing about TV dominance in spare timings of large people’s life, whether
this
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 is making them non
socialise
Use synonyms
 and lazy.
Firstly
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, in recent days younger generations and older generations are spending
time
Use synonyms
infront
Suggestion
in front
 of the televisions watching technical review, news, movies and documentaries.
This
Linking Words
 is a good way for finding the required information.
Deveolpments
Suggestion
Developments
Development
Developments'
 and happenings worldwide can be seen and precautions
requried
necessary for relief or supply
required
 are ensured. People are not
fulltime
for the entire time appropriate to an activity
full-time
 watching television, it’s a spare
time
Use synonyms
relexation
(physiology) the gradual lengthening of inactive muscle or muscle fibers
relaxation
 for the peoples in
metropolitian
relating to or characteristic of a metropolis
metropolitan
 cities as they don’t have
place
Suggestion
places
 to
socialise
Use synonyms
 for
full day
Suggestion
a full day
.
For example
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, during the latest development of
convid
Suggestion
-19, peoples around the world is seeing the news on media channels and
accrodingly
(sentence connectors) because of the reason given
accordingly
 taking enough precautionary measures to avoid spreading.
This
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 is not possible without the awareness from the media. Peoples are taking the positive from News.
Secondly
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, coming to the peoples not
socilaising
the act of meeting for social purposes
socializing
socialising
 the factor is not only televisions. Peoples are busy
in
Suggestion
with
 working life. After the working hours they don’t find enough
time
Use synonyms
 to spend for socialising. Due to
this
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 reason they are relaxing and watching the TV’s.
For
Suggestion
In
this
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 instance I am a real
time
Use synonyms
 example, working from morning 7 to night 7, after reaching home at 8 in the night do I go out to
socialise
Use synonyms
 with the people or try to relax and get ready for the
next
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 day of work. Relaxing without much stress is watching
televisons
broadcasting visual images of stationary or moving objects
television
 is the best way. People who watch tv is not socialising, I disagree with
this
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 statement I am watching Tv in my leisure
Use synonyms
time but
Accept comma addition
time, but
 that does not mean I am not
socialsing
the act of meeting for social purposes
socializing
socialising
. I use
socialise
Use synonyms
 with my friend on
daily basis
Suggestion
a daily basis
 and extended family members on the weekends.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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