IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries it is now illegal to reject someone applying for a job because of his or her age. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#countries #someone #job #age #development
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In the previous decades, it used to happen job applications were rejected from some companies based on applicant's age.But now in some countries have made it illegal to reject someone applying for a job based on their age. I think that
this
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 is going to impact positively on the development of both individual as well as country
level
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.
First
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 and foremost, in any field experience is considered as a key to success. As elder people with more experience are their working styles and their knowledge which is gained through a lot of experience is definitely going to help to crack some deals successfully. Even, younger generations will gain a lot of knowledge by working under seniors.It might happen that the deadlines will be met without much struggle as experienced people know how to tackle some situations. The cherry on the cake would be, the benefits of these policies on country
level
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. The beneficiaries will be mostly for
health
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 sectors. It is observed that, when people are unemployed, they go through a lot of stress and which can be a cause of many
health
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 problems. People end up getting many
health
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 issues when they are stressed financially and mentally.
As a result
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health
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 care system is affected. When someone is busy with work and commitments
,
Accept space
,
 it is unlikely that they will get time to worry about some unnecessary things.
Hence
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 the pressure on
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health care system
Suggestion
the health care system
 would be reduced
as a result
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 of
this
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 policy.
in
Suggestion
In
 conclusion, the current change which is made to the
jobb
the principal activity in your life that you do to earn money
job
 policy which will not allow to reject applications based on applicant's age will have a positive impact on
company
Suggestion
the company level
a company level
level
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,
Accept space
,
 individual
level
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 as well as country
level
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 by reducing the mental and financial stress which people will go through when they are unemployed.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • age discrimination
  • inclusive workplace
  • workplace diversity
  • workforce experience
  • equality in hiring
  • age-related stereotypes
  • demographic changes
  • economic growth
  • social security systems
  • consumer spending
  • non-discriminatory policies
  • bias
  • fair practices
  • retirement age
  • intergenerational collaboration
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