The pie charts provide information about percentage of purchase in British schools in 1981 , 1991 and 2001.
The given pie charts illustrate they other workers’
proportion
of spending in some UK schools in three different years.
In general, we can see that teachers’ Add an article
the proportion
salaries
always were top position. In the meantime
we can Add a comma
,meantime
also
view insurance as bottom
point.
Beginning with spending Add an article
a bottom
the bottom
of
1981 and 1991 we can observe that Change preposition
in
firstly
teachers’ salaries
were spent 40% in 1981,however
Add the comma(s)
,
was
rose by 10% in Unnecessary verb
apply
next
decade. Correct article usage
the next
Secondly
Add a comma
,
salaries
were paid virtually over 20% in the both of years. Finally
we can Add a comma
,Finally
also
witness that Resources e.g books and Furniture or equipment were utilized approximately between 5% and 20% in those years.
Moving on to proportion
spending of Correct article usage
the proportion
2001
we can see that they spent 45% Change preposition
in 2001
to
teachers’ Change preposition
on
salaries
. It is also
worth notice proportion
of Insurance and Resources books spending Correct article usage
the proportion
were
virtually the same ( 8% by 9%) .Correct subject-verb agreement
was
Next
, when it comes to other workers’ salaries
we can also
view that proportion
of spending was reduced Correct article usage
the proportion
up
to 10% in 2001. Change preposition
by up
Additionally
they spent 23% on Furniture and equipment in 2001.Add a comma
,Additionally
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, next".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, salaries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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