IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart shows the division of household tasks by gender in Great Britain. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart shows the division of household tasks by gender in Great Britain. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#division #household #tasks #gender #britain #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart illustrates information concerning the average number of
hours
Use synonyms
 that
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 spend per
week
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
doing seven activities at home.
Overall
Linking Words
,
men
Use synonyms
spends
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 most of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
time
Use synonyms
to watch
Change the verb form
watching
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 television,
while
Linking Words
 the
most
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
favourite activity of women is cooking. The figure
also
Linking Words
 clearly shows that both genders spent the least of their
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
gardening. There was a significant difference in
time
Use synonyms
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
 for using
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 between
two
Correct article usage
the two
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 groups.
Men
Use synonyms
 spend most of their
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching Television, which accounted
14
Change preposition
for 14
show examples
hours
Use synonyms
 per
Use synonyms
weeks
Fix the agreement mistake
week
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. They
also
Linking Words
 spent
time
Use synonyms
 on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 higher than
time
Use synonyms
to cook
Change the verb form
cooking
show examples
, which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 12
hours
Use synonyms
 per
Use synonyms
weeks
Fix the agreement mistake
week
show examples
 and 8
hours
Use synonyms
 per
Use synonyms
weeks
Fix the agreement mistake
week
show examples
 respectively.
Men
Use synonyms
 had an average
time
Use synonyms
 on the remaining activities outlay between 2 to 5
hours
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the largest amount of
time
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
spent by women was used to preparing
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
 (15
hours
Use synonyms
 per
week
Use synonyms
).
Likewise
Linking Words
, they
also
Linking Words
 spend 12
hours
Use synonyms
 per
Use synonyms
weeks
Fix the agreement mistake
week
show examples
to watch
Change the verb form
watching
show examples
 television. Within a
week
Use synonyms
, women
also
Linking Words
 spend
time
Use synonyms
 nearly 5 to 6
hours
Use synonyms
 on chores, which were
washed
Wrong verb form
washing
show examples
 up and cleaning
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
as well as
Linking Words
 other leisure
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
, namely reading
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an average
5
Change preposition
of 5
show examples
hours
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, they spend the lowest amount of their
time
Use synonyms
 at 1 hour per
week
Use synonyms
 on gardening, which
nearly
Add a missing verb
is nearly
show examples
 the same amount as that of
men
Use synonyms
 (2
hours
Use synonyms
 per
week
Use synonyms
).

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, week, men, time, weeks with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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