The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category or exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category or exports in 2016 compared with 2015.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The chart indicates some essential sectors, namely petroleum
products
Use synonyms
, engineered goods, gems and jewels, agricultural
products
Use synonyms
and textile export goods which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
contributed exportation impress of
Correct article usage
the
show examples
government throughout 2015 and 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is brilliantly clear that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the most tremendous rates
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
followed
the
Change preposition
by the
show examples
petroleum and
engineer
Wrong verb form
engineering
show examples
sectors as
opposite
Replace the word
opposed
show examples
to the three
others
Correct pronoun usage
other
show examples
parts depicted lower exportation except
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
gems
Correct article usage
the gems
show examples
and jewellery sector from 2015 to 2016 years.The chart information gives us
advantageous
Replace the word
advantages
show examples
that predict the ascended part of exportation in the future.
According to
Linking Words
the indicators, it is obviously clear that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
petroleum
products
Use synonyms
had increased a minority percentages
as well as
Linking Words
agricultural unit rates,
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
show examples
, gems and jewellery
products
Use synonyms
got a downward trend these years.
In addition
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tremendous differences had observed engineered goods and textiles
component
Fix the agreement mistake
components
show examples
according to
Linking Words
enlarged export rates
one
Change preposition
of one
show examples
in ten and over fifteen
percentages
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
corresponding part both of them during 2015 and 2016 years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
Vocabulary: Replace the words products with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 5 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • export value
  • trend analysis
  • anomalies
  • percentage change
  • sector analysis
  • global demand
  • domestic production
  • economic conditions
  • technological advancements
  • international regulations
  • economic growth
  • trade relations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: