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Writing Samples /
Band 5

The map below is of town of Garldson, a new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map below is of town of Garldson, a new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#town #garldson #supermarket #two #sites #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The Map illustrates two possible linked ways (Hindon and
Cransdon
) via the railway line for another
supermarket
 (S) to be built in
a
Correct article usage
the
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 city of Garldon with
65000
Correct article usage
a 65000
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 population.
Overall
, the designed plan describes
a
Correct article usage
the
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 location of
supermarket
Add an article
a supermarket
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 within
residential
Add an article
the residential
a residential
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 area just near the centre of
town
Add an article
the town
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 of Garldon, which connects and is neighboured by three
towns
 Hindon, Bransdon and
Cransdon
 via railway line and road.
Similarly
 , the location of
industrial
Add an article
the industrial
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 range is north and south. With respect to
town
Correct article usage
the town
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 of Garldson, most of the field is covered under housing,
while
 the three other
towns
Cransdon
 , Bransdon and Hindson are located from
west
Correct article usage
the west
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
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south
Correct article usage
the south
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, northeast and southeast with
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
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 29000, 15000 and 10000 respectively.
Similarly
 ,
Supermarket
 (one) is located
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the southeast
along with
 industries from south and north with no traffic route at
town
Add an article
the town
show examples
 centre. With respect to
Supermarket
 2, the planned location is near residential and the centre of a Garldson,
while
 it is connected directly with two
towns
 and an old
supermarket
 via railway line and all
towns
 by road.
Similarly
, the area of three cities (Hindon,
Cransdon
 and Bransdon) is named with
Add an article
the country
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country side
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "similarly, while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words cransdon, supermarket, towns with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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