Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#organisations #employees #dress #value #quality #work #appearance

Around

world

Suggestion

the world

, there are several

organisations

and each one has different ideas

Suggestion

about

whether their employees should wear or not.In my opinion, employees should

dress whatever

Accept comma addition

dress, whatever

they want

Accept space

Formal dressing should be

necessery

absolutely essential

necessary

unnecessary

in some

organisations

such

politics not

Accept comma addition

politics, not

all of them

Accept space

I believe that if workers are free choice of what he or she wear in

workplace

Suggestion

the workplace

Accept space

they could work more efficiently.

However

Accept space

there must be rules for dressing because

decision

Suggestion

the decision

of what to wear can be hard

with in

internal to, not outside; located in the bounds of

within

expansive range. Employees ought not to wear unusual

clothes

Accept comma addition

clothes, for

for example

too mini skirts

introduces an alternative

shorts. A company or an organisation have value with their employees work not their dress or appearance. Quality of work always more important than employees' appearances.If employees do their

works

Suggestion

work

and do not have under pressure what

wear

we are

we're

to do

Accept space

the organisation's success could be better than others. To sum up

Accept space

except some jobs or

organisations

, employees should be free to

decision

Suggestion

decide

of dressing.

Thus

Accept space

their

organisations

will be flawless and compelling.

Submitted by refiasueda on Tue May 05 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

168 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show that we care. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?

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