The graph on the right shows the unemployment figures amongst women of different age groups. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown. You should write at least 150 words.
The graph shows the percentage of unemployed
women
at 8 ages
. It can be clearly seen that the ages
18 and 45 have the highest unemployment
rate.
According to
the graph, among the age
18, 20 ,25 and 35, the youngest Replace the word
aged
women
have the highest employment percentage (15%), 20 years-old women
have an unemployment
rate a few lower (about 10%), and this
percentage drops gradually until 35 years-old reaching the lowest point, there is only a slight increase in those aged 30, where the unemployment
rate reaches 6 percent
The peak value is recorded amongst 45 years-old Change the spelling
per cent
women
, and all the remaining ages
have much
lower value of Add an article
a much
unemployment
: 8% at age
55 and 9% at age
65.
To sum up
, the figures for most ages
are relatively uniform and change from 5 to 9%, with rare exceptions such
as the age
18 and 45.Fix the agreement mistake
ages
Submitted by kwarts on
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, ages, unemployment, age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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