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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows population figures for India and China since the year 2000 and predicted population growth up until 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows population figures for India and China since the year 2000 and predicted population growth up until 2050. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The
linegraph
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line graph
line graphs
illustrate
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illustrates
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 the past, current and projected
population
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 of the two
countries
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 which are
China
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 and
India
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 between 1990 and 2050.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that there is
and
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an
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 upward trend for
both
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countries
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. The dotted line
demonstrate
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demonstrates
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 the trend of
China
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while
Linking Words
 the solid line
demonstrate
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demonstrates
show examples
 the
population
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 of
India
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. In 1990, the
population
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 of
India
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 were about 0.85
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Fix the agreement mistake
billion
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billions
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billion
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of
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apply
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people
whereas
Linking Words
 there was a huge
diffrent
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difference
different
 from
China
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 with more than 1.1
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Fix the agreement mistake
billion
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billions
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billion
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of
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apply
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people. In the
next
Linking Words
 years, the
population
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 of
both
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China
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 and
India
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 increased
steady
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steadily
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. In 2020, the inhabitants of
both
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the
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apply
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countries
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has
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have
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 a small difference,
China
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 were 1.4
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billions
Change to singular
billion
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 and
India
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were
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was
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 1.3
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Fix the agreement mistake
billion
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billions
Correct your spelling
billion
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of
Change preposition
apply
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people. The two lines describe the
population
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 of
both
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 the
countries
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intersect
Wrong verb form
intersecting
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 each other in 20330 which remained that the
population
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 will be the same
this
Linking Words
 year. It is projected that
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China
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China's
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population
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 will start declining after 2030
while
Linking Words
India
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 will continue to increase and will reach
to
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apply
show examples
1.6 million in 2050.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, countries, china, india, both, billions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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