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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Traffic and housing problems in major cities could be solved by moving large companies and factories and their employees to the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#traffic #cities #companies #factories #employees #countryside
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In all around the world somebody believe, if great factories and companies change their location from
city
 to
countryside
, the
traffic
 and housing difficulty will be
solve
Suggestion
solved
. But there is not any proof to say that in hundred percent correct. Major of rush hours is for morning when people go to work and evening when they want to come back. So by changing the location, the
traffic
 can transfer to
countryside
Suggestion
the countryside
.
However
, there is advance public transportation in
city
in contrast
 of
countryside
 and village. So people in the
countryside
 are more have to use their own car than people in the
city
In
Suggestion
On
 the other side, facilities, shopping
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
,
tourism attraction
Accept comma addition
tourism, attraction
, parks and amusement Parks have the most powerful affective in
traffic
 and housing problems.
For
example in
Suggestion
example, during
example during
 holidays there is a heavy
traffic
 in the street. So these problems cannot completely depend on factories and companies and their employee. In spite of
this
 may be a fact that by reducing numbers of work's vehicle on
city street
Suggestion
a city street
city streets
, a large percentage of
traffic
Suggestion
the traffic
 will obviously decline, especially
in
Suggestion
during
 rush hours, because there are some person that prefer to use their own vehicle
instead
 of public transportation for their
comfortably
Suggestion
comfort
comforters
comforts
. In conclusion, I believe that the majority of the
city
's problems as
traffic
, housing, air pollution is not depend on factories and companies. There are other
reason
Suggestion
reasons
 for it
such
 as shopping
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
, amusement parks and when every development
facilities
Suggestion
facility
concentrate
Suggestion
concentrates
is concentrated
 in
city center
Suggestion
the city centre
city centre
; these problems are
consequence
Suggestion
a consequence
consequences
the consequence
 of that design.
Submitted by SaNia GouDaRZi on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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