People in the lime light have a responsibility to set an example for others by their good behaviour. Do you agreee?

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Some people say that famous people should represent good traits to be model roles for others. I totally agree with
this
statement, because those celebs have a huge impact on children and foreign people. Social media has exposed everything at our fingertips. Young people will follow their favourite artist or actress in those platforms.
For example
, Many
of
Verify preposition usage
apply
show examples
celebs have Twitter and Instagram accounts which have millions of followers.
In addition
, if an artist
upload
Change the verb form
uploads
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a picture that contains
alcohol
Replace the word
alcoholic
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beverages, that will encourage their fans to try it. Recent research has found out that the majority of users of those platforms were minor people.
Also
, many posts may have porn. Which have a damaging effect on children's brains
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Many
of
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apply
show examples
celebs have international fame. So they represent their country and culture.
For example
, if foreign people follow an actress and he/she has
a bad habits
Correct the article-noun agreement
bad habits
a bad habit
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, they will think that
a
Add an article
the
show examples
ctress's society
also
have
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has
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those habits. And that
misrepresnt
Correct your spelling
misrepresent
misrepresents
that country traditions and reputation.
For instance
, some
of
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apply
show examples
t
Add an article
the
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ourism association make a survey on
it
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its
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customers and found out that many
of
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apply
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people avoid
specefic
Correct your spelling
specific
country because some famous people represent a harmful impact
for
Verify preposition usage
on
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their
traditionals
Correct your spelling
traditional
. To conclude, I
highy
Correct your spelling
highly
believe that those people who have fame should be careful of their attitudes because they have a massive impact on teenagers and stranger people.
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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