IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT DEVELOPED COUNTRIES HAVE A HIGHER RESPONSIBILITY TO COMBAT CLIMATE CHANGE THAN DEVELOPING COUNTRIES. OTHERS BELIEVE THAT ALL COUNTRIES SHOULD HAVE THE SAME RESPONSIBILITIES TOWARDS PROTECTING THE ENVIRONMENT. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

#people #countries #responsibility #combat #climate #change #responsibilities #environment
Climate change is one of the biggest challenges faced by humankind. While some people advocate equal contribution from all
nations
 to solve the issue, others think developed
countries
 should be more accountable. In
this
 essay, I will analyze both arguments and elaborate
why
Change preposition
on why
show examples
 I agree with the latter one. The main reason to hold developed
nations
 accountable is that they have been both the biggest polluters and the biggest beneficiaries of global economic development in the past century. Since the
second
 industrial revolution, these
nations
 have quickly adopted industrialised production, used fossil fuel as
energy
Add an article
an energy
show examples
 source and started international trade. Significant economic success was achieved and tremendous wealth was accumulated, but carbon emissions from these activities were never challenged. If the past excessiveness has resulted in or accelerated global warming, it is reasonable to ask developed
nations
 to bear the consequences and contribute more to tackle the issue. On the other side, some argue that developing
countries
 are equally accountable because of their rapid growth and big scale of pollution in the recent decade.
For instance
, the biggest three developing
countries
, China, India and Brazil, emit
large
Correct article usage
a large
show examples
 proportion of carbon dioxide. Admittedly, these
countries
 should curb
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
show examples
 they are producing and opt faster to a more sustainable growth model so that they would not deteriorate environmental problems. When being asked to limit carbon emissions, they should do their parts.
Nevertheless
, it is still not fair to ask for
Change the article
the same
show examples
same
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
 contribution from these
nations
 as from the developed world without considering the historical context. To conclude, every state should make efforts
slow
Fix the infinitive
to slow
show examples
 down
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
climate change.
However
,
contribution
Add an article
the contribution
a contribution
show examples
 from each country may vary and should be weighed according to
pollution
Add an article
the pollution
show examples
 produced in the past. In
this
 measurement, the developed
countries
 should bear bigger responsibility.
Submitted by henggu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: