Sales companies should recruit people who are hungry for money as they will make the most dedicated workers. Do you think money is the driving force behind hard work? What factors should be taken into consideration when recruiting staff for sales positions?

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Some people argue that when sales companies need to hire an employee, they should consider professionals who are vivid for

money

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because

this

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means these employees will

work

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harder. In

this

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essay, I will explain why I believe

money

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is the key to hard

work

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, and pinpoint factors that are important when hiring professionals for sales spots. It is often argued that many workers execute their tasks hardly because they want more and more

money

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. I agree with

this

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opinion because I believe

money

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is the primary factor why people

work

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intensely nowadays. To illustrate, everybody needs

money

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to do numerous activities,

such

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as buying new products or travelling.

In other words

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, the society we are living in consumes products and services on an increasing scale.

Therefore

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, the harder people

work

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, the more

money

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they will have to maintain their lifestyle. That being said, I believe there are other crucial factors that companies should consider when recruiting someone who will be a sales representative. The first main factor is to be someone who has good communication

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

This

Linking Words

is because I think

this

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skill is highly important when someone is selling something and,

for instance

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this

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is the key factor that will make the customer buy the product or service.

In addition

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, a salesman should have persuasive ability because not always the customer want to buy the product.

However

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, if the salesman is good enough, he will convince the client that the product is essential and,

as a result

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, the client will buy it. In conclusion, I believe

money

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has a decisive role in hard

work

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. But I

also

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believe there are other characteristics that companies should worry about when they need a salesman,

such

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as communication

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and the ability to persuade the client.

samirzakurThu Apr 01 2021

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Task Response

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments about the importance of money in driving hard work and the factors to consider when recruiting sales staff. This will help strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph is well-connected to the overall argument. Use transitional phrases to guide the reader through your points more smoothly.

Coherence and Cohesion

Clear introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points effectively.

Task Response

Thorough discussion on the importance of money as a driving force for hard work.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Sales companies should recruit people who are hungry for money as they will make the most dedicated workers. Do you think money is the driving force behind hard work? What factors should be taken into consideration when recruiting staff for sales positions?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many young people choose to take a year out between finishing school and starting university in order to gain work experience or to travel. The experience of non-academic life this offers benefits the individual when they return to education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Happiness is considered very important in life, but it is hard to define. Why is happiness difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?