Eating too much sugar is harmful for health. Some people think that it is government responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption while others think that it is individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views

Nowadays, containing a lot of
sugar
in foods makes
people
unhealthy. According to
this
, some
people
say that the problem belongs to the government, while others believe that it is a personal issue. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
I will be exploring both views.
Firstly
,
people
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mention that the government should take responsibility
restrict
Add the particle
to restrict
show examples
the amount of
sugar
by enforcing the law. On
food
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,food
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the main problem is the advancement of
technology
.
This
is because the proceeds of transportation made it faster to reach the
sugar
from farm to facility. Due to
this
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,this
show examples
the price of
sugar
is declining and it is easier to use a number of
sugar
.
Secondly
,
sugar
has
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
nature not to rot the products so that companies tend to use it.
However
, in view of too much
sugar
being a personal problem, it depends on your own decision. The reason is that if you buy products at a supermarket, it shows the details.
Furthermore
,
advancement
Correct article usage
the advancement
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
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technology
made
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
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products that do not contain
sugar
much.
Besides
,
people
argue that there is another issue
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
people
are not much more active than before. Associated with
this
, there are the citizens that the amount of
sugar
is the same but their bodies are healthy. In conclusion, too much
sugar
is one of the main problems these days. There are
people
who believe that it is the government 's fault or not. The difficulty is that both ideas involve the advance of
technology
so that the citizens need to use the
technology
as a good way and it is possible that
people
can become healthy one day.
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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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