A big salary is much more important than a job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction

It is a dogma amongst a certain section of the society that, wealth can attract jubilation in life. In the following essay, I will be enlisting points on how money can make people joyful and various other avenues that can pave way for pleasure in one's life. To embark on, financial freedom is the dream of every human being on

this

planet. Every human wants an enormous bank balance

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so that they can acquire anything desired by them, rather than adding it to their wish list,

for instance

, if today I plan to buy a luxury car, I may have to look at all perspectives and the ripple effect it can cause on my entire budget. On the flip side, if I am rich, the only thing to worry about would be, the model and colour of the car I am interested in.

Hence

, being wealthy can help in leading a luxurious life.

On the other hand

, the majority of the world's population is not sound financial,

however

, they have found the secret to jubilation. To elucidate, each day once they are back after an exhausting day at work, a simple yet priceless smile of their baby rejuvenates them. A surprise menu at the dinner table tends to relieve them of all the stress in mind.

Hence

, pleasure can

also

be gained from numerous small gestures apart from being rich. To recapitulate, tremendous funds can enable us to purchase material things but is not necessary to be happy, as if that was the case, 80 per cent of the people on earth will be cheerful.

Submitted by jatinkochar1993 on Thu Sep 02 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

265 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

remuneration
financial security
motivation
luxuries
material possessions
fulfillment
work-life balance
stress levels
mental well-being
job security

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A big salary is much more important than a job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

There should be a complete ban for advertising. So that we can benefit from its negative effects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

Millions of dollars are spent on spac research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you thing this is a positive or a negative development?