Many crimes are often related to the consumption of alcohol. Some people think that the best way to reduce the crime rate is to ban alcohol. Do you think this is an effective measure against crime? What other solutions can you suggest?

#crimes #consumption #alcohol #people #crime #rate #ban #measure

It is often argued that alcoholic persons are most likely to commit crimes . Some people claim that banning the sale of liquor can be the ultimate solution to reduce the crime rate . In my opinion , I strongly believe that

this

decision will be not an effective solution to

this

problem but there are several approaches that should be applied to solve

this

issue . On the one hand , it is true that people under the influence of alcohol cannot think coherently and

then

they will have more probability to commit a violation and act not normally .

As a result

, if the sale of liquor will be banned , their consumption will be reduced and

then

multiples of lawlessness will be decreased ,

such

as traffic crimes and domestic violence .

However

, in some cases , even if persons are not alcoholics, they are criminals because they suffer from moral depravity or ignorance , for ,example terrorist attacks , in these situations banning or not ,alcohol will behave a to not influence these violations because there are strong reasons for their incorrect behaviours .

On the other hand

, there are several approaches that should be taken in order to reduce the violation rate in society .

Firstly

, the majority of criminals are from poor backgrounds ,

then

if the government would decrease the crime rate , it should increase the standard of living for all people by providing adequate education and opportunities

Change preposition

for

show examples

jobs for them .

Therefore

, they will ensure sufficient earnings for their life .

Secondly

, the government should help the population who are suffering from mental health issues by providing affordable counselling to them and adequate support to combat these mental disorders . In conclusion ,

although

that banning liquor can reduce some crimes in the community ,it is still not sufficient to combat

this

issue . I believe that making education affordable for all persons and offering them opportunities of working and

also

providing support and help for individuals who have mental disorders can be effective solutions to

this

problem .

Submitted by molfruit7 on Sun Nov 07 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

354 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

crime rate
consumption of alcohol
effective measure
ban alcohol
contribute to
types of crimes
other solutions
reduce the crime rate
education
awareness programs
stricter law enforcement
penalties
support
rehabilitation
alcohol addicts
root causes of crime

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Many crimes are often related to the consumption of alcohol. Some people think that the best way to reduce the crime rate is to ban alcohol. Do you think this is an effective measure against crime? What other solutions can you suggest?

Fully explain your ideas

Since traffic is such a problem in modern cities, private cars should not be allowed in city centres. Discuss the arguments for and against this statement. What do you think we should do about the problem of traffic in city centres?

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is best to save money, for example in a bank or savings scheme. Other people feel that money should be spent whenever it is available. Discuss these views and reach an opinion on this debate.