The graphs show figures relating to hours worked and stress levels amongst professionals in eight groups. Describe the information shown to a university or collage lecturer.

The graphs show figures relating to hours worked and stress levels amongst professionals in eight groups. Describe the information shown to a university or collage lecturer.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar
chart
illustrates the average amount of worked time in eight different professions
while
the pie
chart
depicts the rates of
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
stress levels. All in all, it is obvious that businessmen and movie producers work more by far
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to other groups
while
the
worked
Replace the word
working
show examples
times of chefs and
lecturers
are
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
last
place.
However
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
prevalence of stress-related illness is more common in
lecturers
and lawyers and it is so rare for writers. Regarding the bar
chart
, a businessman works generally 70
hours
per week and movie producers
works
Correct subject-verb agreement
work
show examples
ten
hours
less than them. The figures for doctors and writers amounted to nearly 50 and 45
hours
, relatively. The average number of programmers is 40
hours
and the
last
two groups, chefs and
lecturers
Change noun form
lecturers'
lecturer's
show examples
working
hours
are close, at around 30
hours
. As for the pie
chart
, the
lecturers
are the most suffering group from stress and accounted for 25
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
and subsequent groups movie producers and doctors made up 26
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, collectively. The rates of chefs and
business man
Correct your spelling
businessman
show examples
are close
each
Change preposition
to each
show examples
other at around 10
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
and slightly less than one in ten people who is a writer suffering from stress. The figure for programmers constituted only 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Submitted by meliike.bekcii on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last, while".
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, lecturers, hours, percent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: