Some people do not mind to spend their leisure time with their colleagues while some people prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Although
some people
like to spend their free time
with their workmates,others keep their personal life
away from work
life
.In my opinion,there should be a gap between once
personal and professional Correct your spelling
one
life
.
On the one
hand,some people
consider it as
a good idea to spend their leisure Change preposition
apply
time
in the workplace or with their colleagues. They may not have other friends in their personal life
and they enjoy spending time
in the professional atmosphere.It will be helpful to improve the relationship between the co-workers and that will be helpful for the job.For example
,if there is good rapport and understanding between the group members,the result of their team world will be great.Furthermore
, by doing spare-time
activities with colleagues,even in the time
when away from work
environment Correct article usage
the work
one
can be in touch with the working atmosphere and it helps to return back to the job easily after the break from work
.
On the other hand
,free time
ought to be spent away from the workplace for many and I agree.There should be a barrier between private life
and work
-life
due
to
some reasons. Change preposition
for
Firstly
, a person is spending around 5 days in
a week in a stressful working environment so, get relaxation from that to ventilate the tension .For Change preposition
apply
this
, a place away from work
and people
without professional relationships are
better.Change the verb form
is
Moreover
, if a person full
Correct word choice
apply
stay
away from Correct subject-verb agreement
stays
the
Correct article usage
apply
work
for a vacation,it will help him refresh and get energy fast and one
can go back to work
full of energy. In addition
, I believe that professional and private life
should be different because jobs can be changed frequently consequently
people
surrounding also
will be changed but having a strong personal life
and relationship is a must for a productive life
.
To conclude
,it is often thought by some that personal and professional life
should always have a boundary and others are in the opposite view. I personally believe that one
should keep all work
-related affairs in the workplace and there should not be any relation between the own individual private life
with work
life
.Submitted by nicymathew91 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a basic level of coherence and task achievement. The logical structure and organization of ideas need improvement. The introduction and conclusion are present but need to be more developed. The main points are supported adequately, but the development is lacking. The response addresses the task and presents relevant examples, but the ideas need to be more clearly expressed and developed.
task response
The essay demonstrates a basic level of task achievement and coherence. While it addresses the prompt and presents relevant examples, the ideas are not expressed clearly and lack development. The introduction and conclusion are present but need to be more developed. The main points are supported adequately, but the development is lacking. Overall, the essay demonstrates a basic level of coherence, cohesion, and task achievement and would benefit from clearer organization and more developed ideas.