IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Should the production and sale of cigarettes be made illegal?

Cigarettes should be made illegal for many reasons. The two reasons are addiction and health. The
first
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 reason is addiction. People who smoke cigarettes have a high chance of getting an illness. Smoking is extremely harmful
such
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 as causing red eyes or even poor muscle coordination. It can
also
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cause
Use synonyms
 delayed reaction times. Smoking too much marijuana or weed can
cause
Use synonyms
 addiction, which can result in terminal illness or even death. Smoking has never been a healthy decision. Smoking can
cause
Use synonyms
 permanent heart disease or lung cancer. As stated before, smoking can
cause
Use synonyms
 poor muscle coordination or delayed reactions. Thanks to advertisements, humans
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
 vape or smoke have put an end to
this
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 lethal “pleasure”. Protests about smoking have started, putting an end to some weed or marijuana plantations.
On the other hand
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, cigarette making companies will do everything in order for the law to be rejected. Thankfully the countries of Norway, New Zealand, Uruguay, Malta, Italy, Sweden, Scotland, Bhutan, Lithuania are smoke-free. In my opinion, smoking has brought nothing but harm to the world we live in.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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