IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to get a satisfying career than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#people #job #career #change #jobs
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Nowadays,many individuals feel that doing
one
Use synonyms
job
Use synonyms
 constantly makes them boring as well as irritating them.humans have diverse mindsets which
varies
Change the verb form
vary
show examples
 from person to person.some
people
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 work under organisations for long years while others alter their
jobs
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 often.
people
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 gain ample benefits by doing
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 work constantly.I strongly accord with the statement.
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss why
this
Linking Words
 is beneficial. To embark on,staying at
one
Use synonyms
 company means
interest
Add an article
the interest
show examples
 on only
one
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 skill.these days,
people
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 are in the depression due to changes their
jobs
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 for simple reasons like getting a low income and lack of transport facilities while they are going to
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
.choosing only
one
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job
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 brings mind-relaxation
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they do not need to search
another
Change preposition
for another
show examples
job
Use synonyms
.
for instance
Linking Words
,according to
one
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 study,
people
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 who are resigning their
jobs
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 early
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have a mental tension in search of acquiring a good
job
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. On another hand,
people
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 may have got a chance to earn
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 salary and experience.prominent companies like google and Wipro offer a decent salary after some time
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
if we
working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
 continuously for that particular company.for
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example,if a person
staying
Wrong verb form
stays
show examples
 at
one
Use synonyms
 organisation for many years,after ten years he got a promotion like CEO position,
then
Linking Words
 he will
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
 in his position without
troubles
Fix the agreement mistake
trouble
show examples
.especially,
people
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 who have government
jobs
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 ,those persons do not resign their
job
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.because after their retirement there is a chance to get
pension
Add an article
a pension
the pension
show examples
. To conclude,nowadays,every
job
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 is dominant ,because competition is increasing by leaps and bounds if we lose
Use synonyms
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
then
Linking Words
 it is very difficult to obtain another
job
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.
therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should not leave their
jobs
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.
job
Use synonyms
 is an indispensable thing in everyone's life.
Submitted by anushachenna15 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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