IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas (in words, pictures, music or film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many
ideas
Use synonyms
, which have been creative by
artists
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, must have the freedom for presenting to a community in any way
such
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 as words, pictures, music or movie.
Moreover
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, a
government
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 should
control
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 with an equal standard. In my opinion, I completely agree about
this
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 idea
however
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 the idea should be illustrated with reality without
a fake
Remove the article
fake news
a piece of fake news
show examples
news
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. After the revolution of Thailand in 2015, they have not been changed in a
government
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 with
control
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 by the prime minister who has been the same in 7 years ago.
this
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 is not a normal situation in Thailand
thus
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 many
artists
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, who disagree about
this
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 revolution, are protesting in different ways,
for instance
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, some
artists
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 comment about the
government
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 on the social network after that they will have blocked by the
government
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, some
artists
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 find the way to illustrate by pictures, music or film these making people access to the
news
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, which
government
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 restrict it, easily.
Finally
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, these
ideas
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 that I mentioned
to
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apply
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have been concealed by the
government
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
artists
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 saw a benefit of globalization which can let people
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
easy accessing by spreading fake
news
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, so I agree to the
government
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 which they can
control
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this
Linking Words
 fake
news
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however
Linking Words
 they should be giving freedom to every artist who creating performance with the fact.
Lastly
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, if the
government
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 has not
an
Add a missing verb
have an
show examples
 equal standard, they will be cannot solve these problems in a long term. In conclusion, I agree with the concept about the
artists
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 who have the freedom to create their
ideas
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 but it must
a trust information
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trust information
a piece of trust information
show examples
. So the
government
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 can
control
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 the
ideas
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 in case of the
artists
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 make fake
news
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 in their performance.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Freedom of expression
  • Censorship
  • Artistic integrity
  • Cultural identity
  • Social responsibility
  • Public order
  • Discrimination
  • Hate speech
  • Self-regulation
  • Government intervention
  • Vulnerable groups
  • Creativity
  • Democracy
  • Fundamental right
  • Moral obligation
What to do next:
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