Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #climate #change

Some believe that

humans

should accept the

climate

change

problem and should try to live with

this

situation,

on the contrary

, others think it would be better if we understand it and take action to prevent its impacts.

While

I accept finding a way to stay with it, I believe that it would be better if we

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

prevent it in advance by being aware of our

lifestyles

in order to provide a quality of life for us and the coming generations. First and foremost,

climate

change

is the main problem that

humans

have faced recently for several decades and it does affect our life beings,

while

a growing number of research has confirmed that human activity is one of the main causes contributing to

this

change

. Regarding the negative effects of

this

situation, it is essential for us to take action to avoid

further

devasting effects of

climate

change

such

as losing biodiversity and extinction of

existed

Wrong verb form

existing

show examples

species. There are simple methods that we can apply to cope with

this

problem

instead

of neglecting it.

For example

, most countries nowadays try to promote clean energy by replacing fossil energy and

also

encourage domestic businesses to maintain their Carbon emission. These measures can help to secure the future for the younger generation to live in

this

world peacefully.

Consequently

, preventing

climate

change

by changing our individual activities is a must and turns out to be the most effective way towards

this

significant situation.

On the other hand

, some people tend to believe that

humans

should learn to live with

climate

change

This

might be because they prefer to accept nature's outcomes as the best solution since it is hard to prevent the natural phenomenon.

Thus

, we should take risks on

climate

change

and find other ways to survive.

As a result

, some technology has been invented to help

humans

in order to support the changing

lifestyles

For instance

, there are some innovations established to fight against

those

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

effects of

climate

change

such

as the system warning for tsunamis and earthquakes

as well as

drought

climate

detection for crop protection. With

Correct article usage

the

show examples

help of advanced technology, we could possibly stabilize our long lives towards the severe weather

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

Nonetheless

, I partially disagree with the view that we should ignore those changes in weather, but

instead

, we should be aware of our

lifestyles

since it is one of the main causes driving an increase in temperature around the world. Trying to live with

climate

change

should always be the value that we keep in mind, but it is not because we intend to do nothing to protect our nature,

conversely

, we as

humans

, need to

awake

Correct your spelling

awaken

show examples

and try to prevent it as much as we can to ensure a better place for the next generations. In conclusion, I am convinced that

climate

change

could be prevented by changing our

lifestyles

and raising awareness among us.

However

, in my opinion, it is a necessity to live and learn from the failures that we have made to nature in order to sustain

this

world effectively.

Submitted by aitsara1129 on Fri May 27 2022

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task response

Provide more specific examples to support your points and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are logically organized throughout the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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17Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

511 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

climate change
prevent
adaptation
mitigation
cope with
effects
shift
mindset
lifestyle
balance
invest
research
technology
crucial
education
awareness

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