IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Do you think businesses should hire employees who will spend their entire lives working for the same company? Do you agree or disagree?

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In the contemporary era, there is a heated argument over the issue that organizations ought to appoint
workers
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 who would spend their whole lives working for the same firm. A lion's share of society
favors
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favours
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 it,
however
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 the rest
averse
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is averse
show examples
 to it. The following paragraphs would elucidate my personal perspective. I see eye to eye with a central idea for multifarious reasons.
First
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 and foremost, firms do not need to provide training again and again to
workers
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thus
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 they can save huge of money and time with it.
Secondly
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,
workers
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 gain more experience with time which will be helpful to boost the profit of the
company
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. Adding
further
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 a couple more things, co-
workers
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 have a strong bond with each other which motivates them to do teamwork.
Furthermore
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, employees will reliable and trustworthy ,
therefore
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, they would not leak any information about the
company
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 to other firms. To substantiate it, I would like to quote
an
Correct article usage
the
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 epitome of my uncle who worked with ABC
company
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 for the
last
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 20 years, he never bestowed any confidential information to anyone
of
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in
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 their firm since he was honest about his work. On the logger’s head, some critics go against the
above-sated
Correct your spelling
above-stated
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 idea. As it would not be possible to change jobs for
workers
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 if they are not satisfied with their current job.
Moreover
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, Employees cannot develop their careers with it.
In addition
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, staff members might work
same
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the same
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 amount for the long term until they will not be promoted to
a higher positions
Correct the article-noun agreement
a higher position
higher positions
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 in the
company
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. All the above-discussed assertions lead to the conclusion that the
company
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 should hire new
workers
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 every year since they will be aware of new technology.
Therefore
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, the
company
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 can expand their business worldwide through intelligent
workers
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 as well as organizations can save massive money since they will not need to spend money on their
workers
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 to pursue education about new inventions.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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