IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

There are many things that can motivate people to perform well in their work. These can include the salary, job satisfaction or the chance to help others. What do you feel is the best motivation to do well at work? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#people #work #salary #job #satisfaction #chance #motivation
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Nowadays, There are a lot of things that employers could do to encourage their
employees
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 to
work
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 better in the office. Some excellent factors that can be applied are wages, job satisfaction
or
Correct word choice
and
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 supporting
opportunity
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opportunities
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. Each one has its own advantages, but
high
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a high
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 salary seems to
work
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 better in most
of
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apply
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the cases, according to my view. It's apparent that well-paid jobs could bring numerous benefits for applicants as
money
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 is the top priority of post-graduate students. For the
first
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 reason, well-paid careers are able to meet the requirements of building up a high living standard
that is
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 really attractive to many well-qualified
employees
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. According to some recent
researchs
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research
researches
 carried out by a group of Japanese scientists, the industriousness and enthusiasm of workers tend to increase by roughly 10% provided that their earnings rise approximately from 1% to 3%.
This
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 may
because
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be because
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 some of those
employees
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 live in hard
condition
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conditions
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 with low living
standard
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standards
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 and they hold responsibilities for bringing up their children or taking care of their parents,
also
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.
However
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, it is still the case with wealthy
employees
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 who simply just want to reach
their
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the
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 achievements that they
has
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have
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 set before. Those guys are usually very ambitious and full of hopes with a variety of long-term goals,
for instance
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: Big villas, luxurious cars or expensive watches.
Besides
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, people want to get more
money
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in
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from
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 their
work
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 in order to be the pride of their big families as well as be appreciated by their friends. Those elements are the main reasons explaining why
high income
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high-income
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 jobs hold much appeal
of
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to
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 young people.
Nevertheless
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, the importance of
money
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 doesn't state that it's the sole factor which could motivate people at
work
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. Some applicants who live in good condition don't mind low salary since they only pay attention to whether the working environment is positive or toxic, they want to have cooperative and sociable colleagues
that
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who
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 all make them feel happy and satisfied.
Moreover
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, Many volunteers in a lot of charity organisations find it
is
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apply
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really interesting and meaningful to assist unlucky, disadvantaged individuals around the world.
By
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Through
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 a number of inspirational stories and the desire to help the
other
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others
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, those volunteers are motivated and willing to
work
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 hard day by day with no complaints. To summarise, Paying more
money
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 is clearly the most effective way to stimulate the
employees
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 to
work
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 better so as to
rise
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raise
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 the efficiency.
However
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, there are still many certain types of applicants who just focus on job satisfaction or the ability to assist others.
Submitted by nguyentatthang1981 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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