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Writing Samples
Band 4

There are many things that can motivate people to perform well in their work. These can include the salary, job satisfaction or the chance to help others. What do you feel is the best motivation to do well at work? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, There are a lot of things that employers could do to encourage their
employees
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 to
work
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 better in the office. Some excellent factors that can be applied are wages, job satisfaction and supporting opportunities. Each one has its own advantages, but a high salary seems to
work
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 better in most of the cases,
according to
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 my view. It's apparent that well-paid jobs could bring numerous benefits for applicants as
money
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 is the top priority of post-graduate students. For the first reason, well-paid careers are able to meet the requirements of building up a high living standard
that is
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 really attractive to many well-qualified
employees
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.
According to
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 some recent research carried out by a group of Japanese scientists, the industriousness and enthusiasm of workers tend to increase by roughly 10% provided that their earnings rise approximately from 1% to 3%.
This
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 may be because some of those
employees
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 live in hard conditions with low living standards and they hold responsibilities for bringing up their children or taking care of their parents,
also
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.
However
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
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 is still the case with wealthy
employees
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 who simply
just
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apply
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want to reach the achievements that they have set before. Those guys are usually very ambitious and full of
hopes
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hope
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 with a variety of long-term goals,
for instance
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: Big villas, luxurious cars or expensive watches.
Besides
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, people want to get more
money
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 from their
work
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 in order to be the pride of their big families
as well as
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 be appreciated by their friends. Those elements are the main reasons explaining why high-income jobs hold much appeal to young people.
Nevertheless
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 , the importance of
money
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 doesn't state that it's the sole factor which could motivate people at
work
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. Some applicants who live in good
condition
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conditions
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 don't mind low
salary
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salaries
show examples
 since they only pay attention to whether the working environment is positive or toxic, they want to have cooperative and sociable colleagues who all make them feel happy and satisfied.
Moreover
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, Many volunteers in a lot of charity organisations find it really interesting and meaningful to assist unlucky, disadvantaged individuals around the world. Through a number of inspirational stories and the desire to help
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others , those volunteers are motivated and willing to
work
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 hard day by day with no complaints. To summarise, Paying more
money
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 is clearly the most effective way to stimulate the
employees
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 to
work
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 better so as to
rise
Verb problem
increase
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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efficiency.
However
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, there are still many certain types of applicants who just focus on job satisfaction or the ability to assist others.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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