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Band 4.5

since the 18th century technology advances have replaced people in the workplace with todays technology. this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. Do what extant do you agree or disagree.

#century #technology #advances #people #workplace #todays #process #rate #unemployment
Technological Innovations are playing
significant
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a significant
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 role in a country like
india
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India
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 since
end
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the end
show examples
 of
eighteenth
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the eighteenth
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 century.
However
, it is somewhere contributing
in
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to
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enhancement
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the enhancement
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 of unemployment .
This
 has become a debatable issue how with several explanations by scholars which will be discussed
further
 with suitable examples.
Initially
 , these advancements are providing
a
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an
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 increase in national income,
moreover
 , I totally agree
upto
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up to
great
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a great
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 extent , as it has been clearly elaborated by a prominent economist namely A smith in his book regarding modernisation .
Although
 it is somewhere affecting the illiterate individuals or labour force, who do not have any other option rather than working in huge manufacturing industries.
Moreover
, they
also
 force dislocation of them from reputed
to
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apply
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-backward industries , in which they have to suffer
reduction
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a reduction
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 in wages . Moving
further
, Britishers had
main
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the main
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 hand in
origin
Correct article usage
the origin
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 of some machinery .
For instance
, Railways, Telegram facilities , Printing press, etc.
Therefore
 they snatched the employment opportunities from many
persons
Replace the word
people
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. For epitome, different riots took place in various parts of
india
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India
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such
 as Orissa, Bengal,Assam etc, regarding labour rights and the discrimination they had faced while working with them on
such
 low wages . On Contrary to
this
, for
betterment
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the betterment
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 of a developed nation like India, innovations are
must
Correct article usage
a must
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 in almost every field.
However
, we can not neglect them because of
betterment
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the betterment
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 of
economy
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the economy
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. More and more machines need less labour force which is unfair for poor citizens as our country statistics
represents
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represent
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 forty
percent
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per cent
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 of the population as jobless because of illiteracy rate. To encapsulate, technology has both pros and cons,
Moreover
, cons can easily
be mitigate
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be mitigated
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 by imitating numerous measures in
content
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the content
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 of finding
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an alternative
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alternative
Fix the agreement mistake
alternatives
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 for poor individuals, who are dislocated.
Instead
 of reducing
utilization
Correct article usage
the utilization
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 of Innovations.
Submitted by poonam.tushir0099 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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