The graphs below show the numbers of male and female workers in 1975 and 1995 in several employment sectors of the republic of Freedonia.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graphs below show the numbers of male and female workers in 1975 and 1995 in several employment sectors of the republic of Freedonia.

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Both graphs refer to lead the percentages of

Use synonyms

men

Change noun form

men's

show examples

and

Use synonyms

women

Change noun form

women's

show examples

employments

Fix the agreement mistake

employment

show examples

from 1975 till 1995.

Overall

Linking Words

, data shows clearly that

men

Use synonyms

are dominating

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the field of employment since 1975 and 1995.

However

Linking Words

, the woman

also

Linking Words

did

incredibly

Change the word

incredible

show examples

progress in the given

last

Linking Words

20 years.

according to

Linking Words

the first graph depicts,

men

Use synonyms

’s employments rate was higher

for example

Linking Words

in the manufacturing sector preferred

men

Use synonyms

’s employees including in the communication sector employee utmost 75% were

men

Use synonyms

in addition

Linking Words

, finance and banking firms

also

Linking Words

filled with

men

Use synonyms

contributions. But more strikingly,

women

Use synonyms

appeared to be

competing

Add the preposition

forcompeting

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shoulder to shoulder against their male counterparts in communication sectors. Moving up with 1995 data,

women

Use synonyms

made significant and impressive progress in retail and public industry. On top of that,

women

Use synonyms

outmatched their male counterparts in securing jobs in retail and communications.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, in the communications and retail sectors allowed to half of the percentage were

women

Use synonyms

. In the finance industry,

women

Use synonyms

are not very far behind their males. In comparison,

last

Linking Words

20 years

men

Use synonyms

’s position was stable

whereas

Linking Words

women

Use synonyms

’s hard work

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

Flourished

Wrong verb form

flourishing

show examples

and gave them better achievement rather than their males.

ahteshamWed Jun 29 2022

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, last".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

189 words

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The graphs below show the numbers of male and female workers in 1975 and 1995 in several employment sectors of the republic of Freedonia.

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinio

These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

It is the responsibility of school to teach children good behaivour aside formal education. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?