some people say History is one of most important school subjects other people think that, in today world,subject like science and technology are more im-portant than History

Some argue that teaching
History
in
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
carriculum
Correct your spelling
curriculum
is crucial, as it helps children understand the current world from their own view.
However
, others agree with putting more emphasis on
Science
and
Technology
education
Change the capitalization
Education
show examples
, saying daily lives at present
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
heavily
rely
Replace the word
reliant
show examples
on high-tech and
science
such
as statics and basic principles. I strongly suggest that
History
cannot be
underrestimated
Correct your spelling
underestimated
considering the fact that we are living
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
full of uncertainty.
First
of all,
history
will tell you the general trend of
technology
. It is true that we tend to use multiple IT devices
such
as PC or mobile phones for basic activities including purchasing products, exchanging money, making reservations, etc. It means that we have to learn at least how to use those devices. What’s more, the deeper understanding you acquire
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
technology
, the more quickly you can finish
the
Change the word
your
show examples
daily routine.
However
, learning
history
will enable users to think about relevant risks with the device. Some geeks chose android phones
instead
of iPhones
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
after they studied what had happened in internet
technology
and realised the risks related
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the dominant supplier or platform.
Secondly
, experts use statistics and possibilities to make a prediction more precise, but
general
Add an article
a general
show examples
prediction
Fix the agreement mistake
predictions
show examples
can be obtained
by
Change preposition
from
show examples
historical facts. An economist got the novel
prise
Correct your spelling
price
show examples
by proving people
are not always behave
Change the verb form
are not always behaving
show examples
to make the most of their profits, which sounds too obvious from human nature. To gain basic knowledge,
history
displays human nature
in general
Add the comma(s)
, in general,
show examples
more clearly compared with
science
and
technology
. Young adults who are not sure about their future jobs can take an advantage of limited time in school education by learning
such
basic
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
as
history
. Those who want to be experts might learn
Science
and
technology
afterwards, but the priority would not be as high as
History
. In conclusion,
although
Science
and
technology
play an important role in our current lives,
History
must be taught in schools for the reasons I mentioned above. It not only facilitates
comparison
Correct article usage
the comparison
show examples
of similar technologies and
prepare
Correct subject-verb agreement
prepares
show examples
their hidden risks
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
helps grasp rough guess about human behaviours.
Submitted by momokonakaoka on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: