In many countries, an increase in crime has been blamed on violent images on television and in computer and video games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Crime
is pervasive
issue in many countries. Many Add an article
a pervasive
people
think that computer games
and movies which include violent images have a significant reason why people
commit a crime
. In this
essay
I will explain why from my point of view Add a comma
,essay
this
statement is not accurate.
First
and foremost, video games
help relieve stress. A vast majority of employees who are communicating are
Unnecessary verb
apply
tent
to have a lot of stress. Correct your spelling
tend
For instance
, after a full shift humans might be devastated and find computer games
as an irreplaceable cure for their mind
. I will probably feel anxious and furious unless I killed dozens of zombies. And a situation like Fix the agreement mistake
minds
this
is common, many individuals use games
to escape from the reality.
Secondly
, when it comes to matters of violent movies, people
suppose that they might make children violate the law. This
fact, however
, has been dicredited
as teenagers with Correct your spelling
discredited
credited
an
educated parents and Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
friendly
environment Correct article usage
a friendly
Correct your spelling
committing
commiting
Correct your spelling
committing
crime less
. Whereas, those who Correct your spelling
crimeless
has
Change the verb form
have
deprived
background are prone to become Correct article usage
a deprived
a
pep. With Correct article usage
apply
this
in mind, society should more care about bringing law awareness for such
kind of class.
In conclusion, we all can see more Correct your spelling
violence
violent
violents
everywhere including Correct your spelling
violence
television
, Change preposition
on television
games
and even Change preposition
in games
Correct your spelling
advertisements
Change preposition
in advertisments
advertisments
. Correct your spelling
advertisements
However
, it can be used for relieving stress and not do this
in a real life. In my opinion, it is not the main gear why people
are
usually commit a Unnecessary verb
apply
crime
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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