In many countries senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Some people think this is not justified. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, In many countries, expert positions have higher salaries compared to those of inexperienced workers of the same company. Some
people
think
this
is not fair, I do not agree
this
Change preposition
with this
show examples
idea because experienced
people
should earn more than other
people
. Fİrstly, experienced
people
should earn much more than inexperienced
people
. Some
people
comply with that but it is fair because experienced
people
always manage and their
duty
is extremely difficult. inexperienced
people
's
duty
is easier than experienced
people
's,
Such
as average officer
duty
and CEO
duty
. being a CEO is a very difficult job but being an officer is not difficult as being a CEO,
Therefore
experienced
people
must earn a high
salary
.
Secondly
, experienced
people
work harder than young
people
. Young
people
do not good at taking risks, İf they don't take risks they would not reach their aim. Experienced
people
have got apparent characteristic features
such
as leadership and management. due to
this
feature, experienced
people
earn a high
salary
but young
people
have not got
this
feature. Young
people
can not manage their company because they have not got
this
ability. To conclude. there are many reasons why experienced
people
earn
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
. I totally agree on every reason because they deserve it. Young
people
do not earn the same amount of money because they lack experience. Professor suggested that young
people
should work hard to be experienced. İf they work hard they would earn a high
salary
. Experienced
people
have got
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
show examples
of
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
different sections but young
people
are very limited.
Submitted by brsson06 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: