Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians or sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #entertainers #film #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money #job

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Some

people

Use synonyms

think that public stars have very high salaries. And I am one of them. I agree with that statement

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

100% and I think that nowadays, there are a lot of underestimated

specialties

Change the spelling

specialities

show examples

, unfortunately.

First

Linking Words

of all, I should mention, that all world-famous

people

Use synonyms

are still ordinary

people

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. They do things which all

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

humans can do: play sports, sing, draw, play, etc. And it is not fair that their

ernings

Correct your spelling

earnings

can be as high as

GDP

Correct article usage

the GDP

show examples

of some pure countries. I guess that

people

Use synonyms

should think about it. What is the value? For what

all

Add a missing verb

do all

show examples

that famous

people

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receive that huge amounts of money? I think

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

It is connected to the extremely high demand

Change preposition

for

show examples

"all

kind

Fix the agreement mistake

kinds

show examples

of stars".

People

Use synonyms

should decrease their high interest and

evaliation

Correct your spelling

evaluation

of entertainers.

Moreover

Linking Words

, nowadays there is a tendency that youngsters

have

Fix the infinitive

to have

show examples

a big desire to become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

famous

star

Fix the agreement mistake

stars

show examples

. But they don't think about the

Correct your spelling

sense

sence

Correct your spelling

sense

of art or sport,

instead

Linking Words

of that, they think about numbers they can achieve (money, followers, views, etc).

That is

Linking Words

not bad to be

reach

Wrong verb form

reached

show examples

or well-known, but it is bad to treat to

indunstry

Correct your spelling

industry

without any respect. In my

Correct your spelling

opinion

oppinion

Correct your spelling

opinion

, when you wondering to do something, you should think about the process and your results, but not about money.

In addition

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

should understand that there are a lot of underrated jobs.

For example

Linking Words

, what about scientists, teachers or doctors? They

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

Correct your spelling

truly

truely

Correct your spelling

truly

can be called our heroes. Without

scientists

Add a comma

,scientists

show examples

are not be

Change the verb form

are not

show examples

able to have

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

quality of living conditions

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

we have now. Without

teachers

Add a comma

,teachers

show examples

we and our children will degrade. Without

doctors

Add a comma

,doctors

show examples

we will just die. So, why that

people

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earn less than world stars? To conclude, I feel that currently humanity is

overwelmed

Correct your spelling

overwhelmed

with different kinds of

entertainments

Fix the agreement mistake

entertainment

show examples

. We should be interested not only in

entertainments

Fix the agreement mistake

entertainment

show examples

. We need to get, that it is better to show our demand

Change preposition

for

show examples

education,

developing

Replace the word

development

show examples

science

Correct word choice

and science

show examples

than to public famous entertainers.

Submitted by snake_shoulders on Sun Sep 25 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

329 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Revenue generation
Supply and demand
Influence on culture
Trendsetters
Income disparity
Essential workers
Critical role
Public health
Endorsements
Economies
Compensation
Significant contribution
Technological advancements
Global challenges

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Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians or sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

Children are facing more pressures from academic, social and commercial sources. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce it?

In many countries, plastic containers have become more common than ever and are used by many food and drink companies. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The topic of renewable energy is widely discussed these days. What are the main reasons behind the increasing use of renewable energy sources, and is this trend a positive or negative development for the environment?

Some pople think that wild animals should not be kept in Zoos. Others, believe that there are good reasons of having Zoos. Discuss both views and give your opinion.