Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

In our society, it is very common for children and young
people
to watch and play violent
video
games
, nowadays, many
people
meet to play and watch
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
of
video
games
, but is it a good thing or a bad thing?
That is
why in
this
essay, I will examine the pros and cons and I will come to a conclusion. Actually. the most famous
video
games
are the violent ones
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since many
people
believe that they are more fun than normal
video
games
, and like all
video
games
you can talk with
people
from all over the world, but how can
this
be good?
well
Add the punctuation
,well
show examples
this
is a good thing because when you talk to
people
from other places you can learn and improve a language.
Also
playing
video
games
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can reduce your stress level, because you enjoy every minute
playing
Change preposition
of playing
show examples
alone or with your friends.
Although
it may seem incredible, it is not, because the biggest disadvantage is that you can lose a lot of money and be addicted to videogames In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
a game cannot be defined
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the
Change preposition
as the
show examples
person you are because all humans are different and it gave me
a
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
good advice, which is that you can not only learn with teachers, you can learn by playing.
Submitted by ismael.222sr on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pivotal
  • desensitize
  • catalyst
  • predisposed
  • harmless outlet
  • distinguish
  • controlled environments
  • empirical research
  • minimal or no direct correlation
  • socio-economic status
  • predisposition
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